I know the thought of working outside the home terrifies some mothers, but the thought of not working terrifies me more.
I've had a job of one kind or another since I was 13 years old and working for someone defines me in so many ways. After twenty years, the rhythm and jolt of corporate life is as much a part of me as anything else. I may rally daily against the bitter politics, the needless to-ing and fro-ing and the egos (oh, the egos!), but I work hard and smart and... it suits me.
Despite appearances, I am a low-risk, security-craving kind of a person and although many people encourage me to get out there and work for myself, that is surely the most terrifying thing of all. To be honest, after so many years in corporate life, in my heart I simply believe I have nowhere else to go.
But, I'm 'better' this year, remember? I'm better. And for many years I've craved... something more. I've felt wasted and I've wanted to get out of big corporate life and do... something else. What and how and where and when, I do not know. But this year I'm at least going to find the courage to think about the possibilities and explore some options.
Thinking can't shake me too much, can it? So what have I got to lose? Oh, please, don't answer that!
Have you ever felt trapped in a cage that only you hold the key to?
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