I work for a large corporate in a reasonably full-on role. When I was pregnant with my third child I went through a frenzied, hormone-charged turn-around that went something like this...
I'm having another baby. My other babies are still babies. I'll have three babies. How can I possibly have three babies and work in the city in a 'big job'? They'll make me put the job first and then the three babies will suffer. My kids will be those kids with really cool stuff because their parents are trying to make up for the fact that they hardly know them. I used to envy those kids when I was a kid, but now I know that it's wrong wrong wrong. And what happens in the school holidays - ALL those school holidays - when the babies grow into bigger babies? Where will they go? For godsake, who will love them for 12 weeks of holiday time?
So, I decided to become a school teacher.
Yes. Throw away 15 years of successfully working in advertising - marketing and become a high-school English - Drama teacher (at least I would still have the hyphen...) earning approximately one third of the salary. But it seemed the only solution to the 3 kids / 3 o'clock pick ups / 12 weeks of school holidays dilemma that I faced.
I enrolled and did my first two semesters, managing uni, a 4 day a week job, the pregnancy and 2 under 3. I handed in my 3 essays and 1 report 2 days before giving birth and did my half-yearly exams 8 days post-CS.
And then I woke up.
I never went back to uni and to this day I have NO IDEA WHAT I WAS DOING.
Frankly, in hindsight, I'm surprised they let us operate heavy machinery whilst pregnant. But understand that when I was pregnant it seemed like the most logical, sane thing in the world. I temporarily forgot that millions of women before me and millions of women after me manage the balance of work and family and that I can be one of those women too.
While pregnant, I forgot that I'm the sort of mum who will always, always put her children first and things would be much the same with three as they were with two. A little bit of give and take, but all of the time my kids are my number one priority and work understands that. I might not spend the amount of time with my children that other mothers do, but I'm comfortable that their lives are balanced, safe, interesting and, most of all, uber-loving. They are happy little people.
I learnt very early on to park my work-ego at the door each day and just get on with the job so I can get home to my real life. And that's a decision I would make even while pregnant.
[Image: Frank Maiorana]
