Thanks everyone for your lovely hurrahs on my birthday yesterday. I had a fab day and was spoiled suitably rotten. The best bit is that with my party months away, this birthday feeling can last for ages! I highly recommend this approach.
Well, I'm forty now, and it ain't no different to 39, which wasn't all that different to 38, which seemed remarkably similar to 37... well, you get the idea. All the way down to about 18, I think. Which means we're all just adolescents at heart. But still, forty seems... milestoney. Like I'm crossing over a line.
I was bemoaning being moaning... sorry, start again... so I was bemoaning turning forty this weekend to my mate the other day and she said, "At least you've got the Trifecta."
"The Trifecta?"
"Yeah, career, husband, babies - the Trifecta. It's what women everywhere want to achieve by forty."
Really? What an odd thing to even think about let alone see as an 'achievement'. I suppose mainly because the career thing happens through sheer hard work and a bit of luck, the husband thing happens through sheer hard luck and a bit of work and the babies are just plain work.
But then, I happen to know that my friend (who I know from work, so tick one box) didn't meet her man until she was about 42 and has been trying unsuccessfully to have a bambino with him ever since. So, I can see how the trifecta is something that she might be a bit wistful about. Forty does seem to be a fairly solid cut-off point for the baby bit.
And there are lots of mummas I know who had to give up a pretty sterling career in order to raise their bubbas in a way they were happy with. So, they're forty and wondering if they'll ever get back into the workforce when it's time for them.
Still others whose husbie's are useless, absent or long gone. They're forty and wondering when their husband is going to join them in growing up...
So, I'm going to shut up about what I may or may not think about this 'trifecta' business and the ridiculous expectations placed on women of today and just be grateful. Grateful that I reached this milestoney age and things seem pretty much on the up for me.
I'm going to be grateful that my work offers me the kind of trust and flexibility that I wish was available to all working mothers.
I'm going to be grateful that my husband offers me the kind of help and support that I wish was available to all wives.
And I'm going to be grateful that I have three cheeky, healthy and loving children that I wish were available to all women (we could raise them together, Big Love style?) My three beautiful Tsunamis are the only trifecta I really care about winning.
See, all that and it's not even Saturday...
Had you heard of the 'trifecta' before?
[Image by Natalie Haywood]
