My own sorrow


A darling friend of mine passed away last week after a seven year long battle with cancer. Oh yes, she fought the good fight. She was always a strong, graceful woman who dazzled with her elegance and wit until the very end.

The funeral was today. Forgive me my public wallowing, but though her death came as a release of sorts, we are all devastated. This letter that I wrote to her in her last week might reveal a little of why (she won't mind me sharing, she was always so open and generous).

Dear Philippa

It has been too long since I have seen you, but, of course, we have always been this way. It is our way.

I think you know how much you mean to me, how fundamentally important you are for me being me. You came into my life at a time when I desperately needed a mentor, a friend to confide in and trust and guide me. You helped me face up to and understand something that happened to me that had blown my understanding of myself and the world off track. You listened, you loved, you gently guided me back. You did so much to help me grow into the person I am today.

I often close my eyes and see your dignified, elegant self. With eyes so compassionate and warm and knowing that we mere mortals are lost in them. Your presence in my mind is calming and inspiring and delightful.

It is 24-year old me who thanks you from the bottom of my heart for your wisdom, intelligence and bottomless compassion. It is me today who will miss you endlessly when you leave us.

I adore you, as always. For always.
Your everloving friend.

x

[Image via tumblr]